My Girlfriend is Pregnant

Some feelings

Finding out your girlfriend is pregnant may take you by surprise and it is normal to feel a range of emotions such as disbelief, anger, joy or happiness.

There are a number of options available to you and your girlfriend. Talking these over with your girlfriend may help you both decide what you can do. You may want to check out our "Pregnant: Working Through your Options" Fact Sheet for more information about what the options are. It may help to remember that your girlfriend could be feeling as confused and uncertain of the options as you.

I'm confused about being a Dad

Having mixed feelings about the possibility of being a dad is normal. It is not uncommon to feel excited and happy about the idea of being a dad.

You might find it hard to deal with the idea of being a father because you feel:

• Not ready
• Too young
• Not settled enough in life to take on this role

It may take time to understand these feelings and taking time to think about them is a good idea. However, try to keep in mind that there is a limited time period to consider the options, especially if the option is to have an abortion (termination of pregnancy). You can talk to the Family Planning NSW Talkline (1300 65 88 86) or your doctor for more information.

Am I ready to be a father?

It may be helpful to think about how being a father will affect you.

The following questions may help you to work out whether you feel ready to be a father:

• Your relationship with your partner. Will we be able to cope with tough times?
• Your responsibilities - Are you ready to take on these new, long term responsibilities?
• Your long term plans - Do you see yourself finishing your education, training, travelling or earning a living?

These questions may be hard to answer. It is OK, to take a bit of time to think about them. It may also be a good idea to talk to someone you trust like your girlfriend, your parents or someone else who has had a child. You might also talk to the Family Planning NSW Talkline (1300 65 88 86) or your doctor for more information.

For more information about being a parent see the fact sheets on the right hand side.

What some young fathers say

You may find it helpful to read some of the quotes below. These are some comments from young fathers:

"Just to see that child smile....makes it all worth it."

"It doesn't matter how old you are, you've still got love." (Shane, 17)

"Don't have kids unless you're really prepared... You've got to become an adult straight away."

Acknowledgement

Thanks to REACHOUT who contributed to this factsheet. They have a great site to visit for more information: www.reachout.com.au.

For more information

Contact the FPNSW Talkline on 1300 65 88 86.

Other Resources

Family Planning NSW has an extensive range of books available for purchase on this topic. Visit the FPNSW Shop.